10 Tips for Communicating With People Living with Deafness (Like Me!)

Deafness exists on a spectrum—from people who are born deaf and don’t use speech to those who are gradually losing their hearing or who suddenly become deaf. It’s a topic close to my heart. I started losing my hearing at age 4, and now—40+ years later—I wear cochlear implants.

So here’s a first-person cheat sheet for anyone wondering how to not be that person in a conversation with someone who’s hard of hearing. (Hi, friend!) Deafness is an invisible disability—it’s easy to forget about, even after someone tells you. Why? Because it’s often hidden under my hair, and because I’ve learned to adapt, avoid, pretend, or—on my better days—laugh about it.

Ready? Here's what actually helps:

1. Laugh With Me, Not At Me

Nothing takes the edge off awkwardness like humor. If we’re both laughing, it’s easier to stay connected—even when the conversation gets bumpy.
Microtip: Read the room. If I’m not laughing, maybe don’t start with the dad jokes just yet.

2. Get My Attention First

Before speaking, try to catch my eye or give a little hand wave. Trust me, it helps you as much as it helps me—because I can actually follow what you’re saying.

3. Use Gestures (No ASL Required)

Hand motions go a long way. Pointing to the door when you say “I’m heading out,” or giving a thumbs-up, helps me catch the context—especially in noisy places. I often respond with nods, smiles, or gestures myself.

4. Please Don’t Yell

Yelling doesn’t help—it actually makes things harder to understand. Hearing through implants is like solving a puzzle with missing pieces. Yelling just distorts the picture further. Plus, I don’t want you looking like an angry mime.

5. Normalize Accommodations

Backing me up when I ask for a quieter booth at the restaurant or a side table instead of the noisy center? Hero move. Better yet, offer before I have to ask. Bonus: don’t invite me to a packed party and expect me to love it. #SensoryOverload

6. Rephrase, Don’t Repeat

If I didn’t catch what you said, try saying it a different way instead of just louder. It’s like giving my brain a second shot at the sentence, but with a fresh clue.

7. Give Me the Topic

If I ask, “Wait—what are we talking about?” give me a one-word topic to help me reorient. Otherwise, I might think we’re talking about cars when it’s actually bars... or Mars. Just a hint helps a lot.

8. Ask Me What Helps

Asking “What’s most helpful for you?” is one of the best things you can do. It helps me advocate for myself (still working on that!) and makes the next conversation easier. Also: instant soft spot for you.

9. It’s Okay If I Miss Stuff

Sometimes I get overwhelmed and need a break from listening. It’s nothing personal. Bonus points if you check in afterward to catch me up on anything important.

10. I See Your Respect—and I’m Grateful

What I appreciate most? When you treat me like a whole person. Not just someone with a disability—but someone who happens to have one. It matters more than you know.

If you’re talking with someone who’s deaf or hard of hearing—you’re also living with that deafness during your time with us. We’re stepping into each other’s worlds.

Here’s your cheat sheet summary:

Be visual. Rephrase. Laugh with us. Respect goes a long way.
And if you’re reading this on behalf of your grandpa, I promise—he’ll feel 10x more connected to you if you try even a few of these things.

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ABOUT ME

I’m a communication student with a focus on content creation. My unique background in youth leadership, caregiving, and storytelling photography brings a depth and maturity that focuses on human connection and inspiration through visual storytelling.

My skill set includes Adobe Photoshop, Lightroom, Canva, and Microsoft Word to create polished, engaging content. I’ve developed a keen eye for authenticity, composition, and tone, which helps brands and projects build trust and emotional connection with their audience.

My diverse experiences in leadership, caregiving, teaching, and living in various places have taught me to adapt quickly, communicate effectively, and think creatively under pressure while remaining grounded.

Whether it’s managing a social media feed, editing a visual campaign, or advocating for underserved audiences, my goal remains the same: creating meaningful, strategic content that performs.

Let’s connect. If you're looking for creative support with social media marketing, photography, and/or content development, I’d love to chat.

Dana

Storytelling Images

• 1—stopped motion

• 2—interesting angle

• 3—storytelling

• 4+5—same scene, different times of day (and 2 steps apart, haha)